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  • Conrad: (yawns) We've been for a long year! (sighs)
  • Sally: What I'm exactly that I need to do!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: I need to go shopping! Goodbye, kids. I'm leaving now. (opens door) Have fun. I'll be back at, uh, 3:30 sharp. (closes door)
  • Conrad: Maybe we can do something, we'll just have permission!
  • Sally: Right, Conrad!
  • (door opens)
  • (orchestration builds)
  • Ken Bahn: (wobbles side-by-side) Morning, Conrad and Sally!
  • Both: Hi, Ken Bahn!
  • Ken Bahn: Well, there goes my appointment. I'm sure you noticed.
  • Conrad: Yeah!
  • Sir: Okay, please! What? (car zooms by) Uh...
  • Fatty Fudge: Morning, Sir!
  • Sir: Morning, Fatty Fudge!
  • Fatty Fudge: We better get to Mrs. Walters' shop. But we mustn't be late!
  • Boy: Thank you, Sir.
  • Sir: Goodbye! (blows his whistle) (car zooms by)
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: Morning, Sir!
  • Sir: Hi, Mrs. Blakeningsop!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: I'll have to go to Mrs. Walters' shop. I won't be long! (drives her car) (Katzenberger and his family exit Mrs. Walters' shop) (the car zoomed by) Whew! (enters Mrs. Walters' shop) (Mrs. Ramsbottom and her baby are getting some apples, and Mrs. Blumberg and Mrs. Thompson need some corn) Wow! There were sure a lot of customers in there!
  • The ginger Harry Potter: Thank you, Mrs. Walters!
  • The kid in the yellow jumper: Thank you, Mrs. Walters!
  • Mrs. Walters: Goodbye!
  • (The Photographer needs to get some cabbages)
  • Cynthia: Morning, Mrs. Blakeningsop!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: Hi, Cynthia! Did you have your shopping list for today?
  • Cynthia: Yes I do! And I need some eggs!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: Right!
  • Cynthia: Zee ya tomorrow!
  • (Mr. Zakinski needs to get some flour and Medroom needs to get some sugar, while Jacques has some oranges)
  • Minnie: Hello, Mrs. Blakeningsop!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: Hi, Minnie! What's up?
  • Minnie: Uh, I need some... cucumbers!
  • Dennis: (He and Gnasher zoom by) Hi, Mrs. Blakeningsop!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: Hi, Dennis!
  • Dennis: Can I get some tomatoes?
  • Gnasher: Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: That explains it. But I'll get some cabbages!
  • Walter: Morning, Mrs. Blakeningsop!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: Hi, Walter, Bertie and Spotty!
  • Walter: Can we need some cabbages?
  • Bertie: Yeah!
  • Spotty: Right!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: Cabbages! Aha! There they are! (lifts her cabbages on her cart)
  • Teacher: Now, children! As anything you can know you can figure figures! (music starts for I Can Figure Figures)
  • Danny: (singing) One plus one minus one is one!
  • Plug: Eleven plus none minus none is none!
  • Toots: One plus none plus two is three!
  • Bash Street Kids: I can figure figures is as easy as can be!
  • Smiffy: Two times seven minus three is eleven!
  • Erbert: Two times eleven minus fifteen is seven!
  • Fatty: Fifteen times thirteen is one-hundred-ninety-five!
  • Bash Street Kids: I can figure figures there's none as anyone alive!
  • Sidney: Twenty-thousand turtles times ten tin tops!
  • Wilfred: Plus fifteen billion bottles minus seven lollipops!
  • Spotty: Divided two bananas that makes eleventeen!
  • Bash Street Kids: French fries, noodles and a green string bean! (song ends)
  • (school bell rings)
  • Danny: Time to go! Thanks, Teacher!
  • Teacher: Goodbye, children!
  • (Fatty Fudge and his son are at the checkout line while Mrs. Walters does the cash register then it rings)
  • Minnie: Excuse me!
  • Mrs. Walters: Minnie, Is there something you need? (cash register rings)
  • Minnie: Why thank you Mrs. Walters!
  • Dennis: (holds a grocery basket with Gnasher in it) Here you are, Gnasher! (chuckles)
  • (cash register rings)
  • Gnasher: Uh-oh! (zooms past)
  • Dennis: Hup!
  • (cash register rings)
  • Mrs. Walters: (gasps) Dennis?
  • Dennis: I'll take Gnasher home! Goodbye.
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: (carries cabbages, gasps) Fatty Fudge!
  • Fatty Fudge (Red): Morning, Mrs. Blakeningsop!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: Morning, Fatty Fudge! Wow! Nice haircut!
  • Fatty Fudge (Red): I like it! Thank you so much! (He and Mrs. Blakeningsop get to the car and she drives it)
  • (Minnie, Dennis, Gnasher, Fatty Fudge and his son are in the car)
  • Fatty Fudge: Let's follow that car!
  • Dennis: Right!
  • (Fatty Fudge drives his car)
  • (The Bash Street Kids are in the car)
  • Plug: Hey, did you see them?
  • Danny: Not yet, Plug?
  • (The blue Fatty Fudge, Mr. Zakinski, Jacques and Medroom go ice skating)
  • All: Ah!
  • (the car zoomed by)
  • Fatty Fudge (Blue): Morning, Mrs. Blakeningsop!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: Morning, Fatty Fudge! Did you go ice skating?
  • Fatty Fudge (Blue): I do!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: Well, hop in!
  • Fatty Fudge (Blue): (hops in to Mrs. Blakeningsop's car) Okay!
  • (Mrs. Blakeningsop drives her car, Fatty Fudge drives his car, The Bash Street Kids are in the car)
  • Spotty: Uh, we're not closer anywhere!
  • Plug: But why?
  • Fatty: Plug, I've got a great idea!
  • Plug: Okay! (drives the car)
  • (the car zoomed by)
  • Fatty Fudge (Yellow): Morning, Mrs. Blakeningsop!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: Morning, Fatty Fudge!
  • Fatty Fudge (Yellow): I went to the bank so I did it this morning!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: Just get in! (the yellow Fatty Fudge gets in her car so she drives it, Fatty Fudge drives his car, The Bash Street Kids are in the car)
  • Plug: We'll put a new radio on and see how it likes! (60s jazz orchestration, music starts for Calculatus Eliminatus)
  • Ken Bahn: (singing) When you mislaid a certain something, keep your cool and don't get hot. Calculatus Eliminatus is the best friend that you've got. Calculatus Eliminatus always helps an awful lot. The way to find a missing something is to find out where it's not. It isn't here. I'll mark this "X". It isn't there. I'll mark that "Y". It isn't underneath the apple. Mark the apple "HKI".
  • Conrad: It isn't in this keyhole.
  • Ken Bahn: No.
  • Sally: And it isn't on my knee.
  • Ken Bahn: Hmmm. Mark the keyhole "K300". Mark the knee "57B". We just jot down all the places where it isn't and gee whiz. Very shortly we were looking where the missing object is.
  • Conrad: It isn't here.
  • Ken Bahn: (off-screen) 842-J.
  • Sally: It isn't there.
  • Ken Bahn: F607. You can mark the piano "22 thousand decimal point 11".
  • Sally: It isn't in the icebox.
  • Ken Bahn: (off-screen) That's strange.
  • Conrad: It's not on this TV.
  • Ken Bahn: Hmmm. Icebox, 0-2-4 1/2. TV, 1,000,003. When you mislaid a certain something, keep your cool, don't go to pot.
  • Kids: Calculatus Eliminatus is the best friend that you've got. Calculatus Eliminatus always helps an awful lot.
  • Ken Bahn: The way to find a missing something...
  • Kids: is to find out where it's not. (song ends)
  • (door opens)
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: (along with three Fatty Fudges) Hi, kids. Hope you had fun today. Well, you kids will never believe this, and we all wait for Minnie, Dennis, Gnasher, Fatty Fudge and his son to come home.
  • (door closes)
  • Conrad: That'll be nice!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: Great!
  • (doorbell rings, door opens)
  • Fatty Fudge: (along with his son, Minnie, Dennis and Gnasher) Morning, Mrs. Blakeningsop!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: Morning, Fatty Fudge!
  • (door closes)
  • Minnie: We've got some groceries!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: Right!
  • Dennis: And then we can do something right there.
  • (door opens)
  • Walter: Morning, Mrs. Blakeningsop!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: Hi, Walter, Bertie and Spotty! Come in!
  • (door closes)
  • Walter: Where were the Bash Street Kids?
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: Oh! They're coming!
  • (door opens)
  • Plug: Hi, Mrs. Blakeningsop!
  • Mrs. Blakeningsop: Morning, Bash Street Kids!
  • Toots: We had fun at school today!
  • Sidney: Yeah! We just do what we want!
  • Wilfred: Right!
  • Erbert: Maybe we just do something here!
  • Smiffy: Okay!
  • Danny: We have pleasure to have. (chuckles)

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